A Consultant Psychiatrist, Dr Maymunah Kadiri, has advised spouses who are aiming to build additional happiness in their homes to feel and think about things that they were grateful for daily.
Kadiri, who is a Mental Health Advocate and the Founder of the Pinnacle Medical Services, Lagos, gave the advice in an interview on Wednesday in Lagos.
She spoke as the world commemorated the International Day of Happiness which is celebrated worldwide, every March 20.
The theme for 2019 is: “Happier Together’’.
According to Kadiri, life is happier when partners remain genuinely happy together.
“Feeling and thinking about the things you are grateful for as you wake up is a great way to build more happiness.
“Research on our brain shows that we always tend to focus on the negative things of life like those worries, tragedies, failures, and discontent.
“Negativity is the default position,’’ she said.
Kadiri quoted a neuropsychologist, Rick Hanson, as saying that “we have got this negativity bias that is a kind of bug in the stone-age brain in the 21st century’’.
According to her, this is why we need to focus on the good and more especially, to hone in on what we should be grateful for.
The mental advocate urged spouses to always remind themselves mentally of three things that they could be grateful for each time they wake up.
She said the things could be written as a reminder.
She mentioned some of the tips that partners could use to stay happy as using Twitter or Facebook if they felt inclined and useful, to remind their followers that it does actually work.
She said they could express gratitude by phoning their or by treating a colleague to coffee for their help with a project or task.
She advised that they try giving back by helping a person or by volunteering for a few hours a week.
Kadiri urged them to practice mindfulness by concentrating and paying full attention to the present moment and accepting it in a non-judgmental way.
She advised them to acknowledge their stressors and let go of them, saying that positive thinking did affect ones performance.
“A fact is that happy spouses make life easier for their partners because their partners are not stressed by the fact that their closest companion is always in a bad mood.
“They are not exhausted by efforts to jolly them along or under constant pressure not to upset them.’’
She also advised spouses never to fail to remind their partners that they were appreciated, urging them to always be thankful for little things.
Kadiri urged them to practice honesty even when ashamed and be kind to one another.
She therefore, advised that they took care of their appearances, smell nice and maintain intimacy and passion both inside and outside the bedroom.